Words Are Things.

“Accept what life offers you and try to drink from every cup. All wines should be tasted; some should only be sipped, but with others, drink the whole bottle.” 
 Paulo Coelho, Brida

I wanted to take a moment to consider the words/phrases/ideas/thoughts that have washed over me and shaped me.

The Good

You only live once – Trina

Trust yourself – My grandmother

My Dear, you have to learn how to take care of yourself – My grandfather

Tell the truth, tell the truth, tell the truth – The opening quote in Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert

It’s okay to be sad sometimes – My husband

What are your values, what is really important to you – Josh

Most people won’t remember this – My mother-in-law

I am so proud of you – My brother

Cry yourself to sleep all you want, you’re not going to that party – My mom

Don’t cheat, people won’t want to play with you if you lie to them – My dad

Think critically about this. It’s never simple – Dr. Krishnakali Majumdar

You have to always be examining your own biases and prejudices and how they influence your thoughts and behaviors – Dr. David Pilgrim

You have to use laundry detergent, not just fabric softener! – My sister

Don’t forget the spiritual aspect – Kevin

The Bad

Are you going to eat that?

You eat after 8pm?

Are you going to have another glass of wine?

What will your boyfriend think about this?

Shhh, your laugh is too loud

You’re too opinionated

You care too much

I think you are acting this way because your parents divorced

You grew up in a home with a lot of conflict and you don’t know how to communicate (that’s why my son hit you)

Relax

Calm down

Everything happens for a reason

Your writing is awful

I should give you the “I like to show a lot of skin award” – Middle School Teacher

I don’t know why you feel that way

You’re crazy

You don’t have kids, you don’t understand

Your husband wants kids and you won’t give them to him?

Are you some sort of lesbian?

Stop talking already

Summary

Words are powerful. What we say matters. I am not innocent; I know I have injured people with my words. The aforementioned phrases, both good and bad, left a permanent imprint on me. They shaped my experiences and I carry them with me.

What phrases shaped you?

Love.

“Words are things. You must be careful, careful about calling people out of their names, using racial pejoratives and sexual pejoratives and all that ignorance. Don’t do that. Some day we’ll be able to measure the power of words. I think they are things. They get on the walls. They get in your wallpaper. They get in your rugs, in your upholstery, and your clothes, and finally in to you.”

― Maya Angelou

 

 

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