The Woman Behind My “Love Wins”

“Little sad with everything around me
I hit the floor and my feet kept moving
I look forward and never backwards
I was out the door like a roman soldier.”

I know Rob Bell wrote a beautiful book titled Love Wins but before the book there was the story of a woman that taught me that Love Wins.

I worked with this woman some years ago. She grew up in a violent home with two mentally ill parents. She would be woken up regularly to witness her mother enduring beatings at the hand of her father. Her mother would pull the young girl in front of her as a human shield. Her father beat the little girl so badly once that he spent the night in jail but the children were never removed from the home. This went on like this for most of her childhood.

She loved her parents because that’s what kids are wired to do. And, the thing about domestic violence is that there is always a honeymoon period filled with gifts, vacations, and fun. It’s complicated and this woman knew that people are complicated. She knew that people are not monsters, even if they are scary sometimes.

What upset her later in life was that rest of her family knew this was happening and they never intervened. She was convinced they were afraid. So, she made the decision that no matter how scared she was she would not let it stop her from doing what’s right. Last I knew, this woman was living a beautiful life.

I vowed that I would live like this. I would choose Love over Fear at every crossroads. And, this woman was right. It’s magic.

I hope if you are fearful now you will still choose love. It’s the only way out of the dark.


“Long hair coming down her shoulders
She is tired and feeling so much older
So tear the pages from the family bible
It came down upon the women for survival
It came down upon the women for survival”


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